Noobsinc’s Blog

Archive for February 16th, 2009

If the planet earth had to anoint one grand imperial “Alpha Male”, it wouldn’t be Chuck Norris, it wouldn’t be Mr. T, it wouldn’t be Bruce Campbell and it wouldn’t even be Batman. It would be Clint Eastwood. And let me tell you something, that old silverback will rip the throat out of any pretender who tries to challenge him for that place in the pack and then wipe is ass with it.

I still remember how much joy I felt when I first saw the poster for Gran Torino. A gruff and pissed off looking Clint Eastwood with a shotgun in his steel hands standing in front of his Gran Torino. I didn’t know a single detail about this movie… but I was already 100% sold. Some critics have already given their reviews of this film. Some saying it’s pure creative genius, some saying it’s one of the worst films of the year. In my opinion, the truth of Gran Torino lay somewhere in between.

THE GENERAL IDEA

The synopsis for Gran Torino reads something like this: “A racist Korean War veteran living in a crime-ridden Detroit neighborhood is forced to confront his own lingering prejudice when a troubled Hmong teen from his neighborhood attempts to steal his prized Gran Torino. Decades after the Korean War has ended, ageing veteran Walt Kowalski (Clint Eastwood) is still haunted by the horrors he witnessed on the battlefield. The two objects that matter most to Kowalski in life are the classic Gran Torino that represents his happier days working in a Ford assembly plant, and the M-1 rifle that saved his life countless times during combat. When Kowalski’s teenage neighbor (Bee Vang) attempts to steal his Gran Torino as part of a gang initiation rite, the old man manages to catch the aspiring thief at the business end of his well-maintained semi-automatic rifle. Later, due to the pride of the Asian group, the boy is forced to return to Kowalski’s house and perform an act of penance. Despite the fact that Kowalski wants nothing to do with the young troublemaker, he realizes that the quickest way out of the situation is to simply cooperate. In an effort to set the teen on the right path in life and toughen him up, the reluctant vet sets him up with an old crony who now works in construction. In the process, Kowalski discovers that the only way to lay his many painful memories to rest is to finally face his own blinding prejudice head-on.”

I was beyond excited when I first heard about the original Underworld movie. I mean come on… werewolves versus vampires! Does a geek need to hear anything else to get his blood pumping? The answer is no. Add on top of that a hot as hell Kate Beckinsale dressed in tight leather fighting the armies of the night. Sign me up! Unfortunately the movie didn’t quite live up to it’s potential. It had fantastic style and a great mythology behind it, but it suffered in its execution. It did introduce us to my all time favorite movie vampire however… Viktor! Then came Underworld 2 and it was… how do I put this? A giant sack of crap. It’s just best that we all treat it like Highlander 2 and just forget it ever existed.

When they first announced that there would be a third Underworld film I was extremely apprehensive (because the second one was so bad and he story seemed to have nowhere left to go), until I found out that it was going to be a prequel. An Underworld movie about the old war. Showing the Vampires in all their glory and the Lycans in all their savagery. This was the Underworld movie I had been waiting to see. Did it deliver on all my hopes and dreams? No… but it was still quite good and without a doubt the best Underworld film to date.

THE GENERAL IDEA

The synopsis for Underworld: Rise of the Lycans looks something like this: “This prequel story traces the origins of the centuries-old blood feud between the aristocratic vampires known as Death Dealers and their onetime slaves, the Lycans. In the Dark Ages, a young Lycan named Lucian emerges as a powerful leader who rallies the werewolves to rise up against Viktor, the cruel vampire king who has enslaved them. Lucian is joined by his secret lover, Sonja, in his battle against the Death Dealer army and his struggle for Lycan freedom. FX artist Patrick Tatopoulos, who developed the creatures for the first two films, is directing.”